Avoiding Good Things

There are two unrelated things in this world that I tend to find reasons to avoid despite the fact that they are both good for me and enjoyable. The first is exercise; the second is writing.

I can't fathom the reason for this personality quirk. Time and again, I get proof that I feel better throughout the whole day if I've worked out and also worked on my novel. In fact, if I don't do both (and especially if I do neither), I feel awful.

Yet every morning I have to convince myself that it's a good day to exercise. There are a plethora of reasons not to, ranging from wanting more sleep to believing that I'm running late (which is virtually impossible with my flexible work schedule). I barter with myself, saying I'll exercise later in the day, knowing full well that if I don't do it in the morning, I'll probably find an even better reason not to go for a run in the afternoon. However, once I've convinced myself that I'll just go to the gym for a walk or a half workout, I'm almost always guaranteed to enjoy the experience and do the full workout. And I know this every single day when I'm arguing with myself.

Writing is no different. When I'm working a lot, I think I'll get to it at the end of the day, though I know I'm usually too tired of sitting in this chair to want to stay for another hour. When I've got a day devoted to writing, there's still a lot of arguing with myself about whether to check email first or to check blogs or to blog or to check CuteOverload.com, call my mom, play with the cats, do some laundry... the list goes on and on. But when I sit down and put in my writing time, I really enjoy it.

And when I get to the end of my day having written and exercised, I feel great physically and mentally. So why don't I wake up every morning saying, "I can't wait to go for a run then get back up here and write?"

I still don't have the answer, but today, I did both, and I feel really great.