Tuesday, July 3, 2012

The New Page 69 of Eva

Last week, I posted page 69 of Eva, following the idea that page 69 of a book can give you a micro-view of the greater themes and characters of the book (according to The Page 69 Test).

However, I've been hard at work editing this last week. Editing for me often means trimming, so after cutting two pages worth of text out of the first 68 pages, here's the new page 69, which I feel more accurately reflects the themes and characters of the book even if it doesn't include one of my favorite scenes.

The New Page 69 of Eva

“I’m more concerned about the bad luck that elephant carries with her,” Hudson said.
            “The cars breaking down?” Sofie guessed. I didn’t say anything, and Sofie didn’t look at me.
            “Yeah. And the phones. It’s more than a string of bad luck.”
            “You don’t honestly believe that, do you?” I asked. “A cursed elephant?”
            “Exactly. It’s cursed.” A marble winged cherub floated off his left shoulder. I eyed it, then Sofie. If I could see the divination, she could, too, along with a whole lot more. But if she understood what it meant, she didn’t clue me in.
            “Plus we’ve got that trashed Suburban to fix.” Hudson gestured toward the carport. “Normally I would call up the rental company and have them send us a new car, but I can’t. Not with all that water damage. Somehow we’ve got to get that cleaned up before we can report that it broke down. That’s going to take time I’d rather spend finding Jenny and getting ourselves out of this mess.”
            “Perhaps the car will be working by tomorrow,” Sofie said, eyes innocently wide.
            I calculated the distance from the pool house to the carport. Far enough. Ten hours was more than enough time for a vehicle to recover from my company.
            Hudson was politely skeptical. “I’ve never known a vehicle to spontaneously repair itself. Plus, I can’t impose on you. I really should be getting back home and get working on finding Jenny.”
            “I thought you said you had your coworkers doing that?” Sofie asked.
            “I do, but this whole thing is a mess, and the sooner we can get it straightened out, the better. God, the back of that Suburban…” He shook his head. “I don’t think we’re ever going to get it cleaned.”

Poor Hudson is only beginning his frustrating experience with the "elephant curse." (Cue maniacal giggling.)

Okay, back to edits. I'm 31 pages from the end with only one plot line that needs to be massaged into making sense, with changes affecting the entire book. Yes, that will be a pain in the butt, but I'm celebrating the fact that it's only one plot line.

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